Weekly thoughts

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I’ve had a delightful couple of weeks – so busy, in fact, that I have started to neglect my blog. Patience makes the pervert’s heart grow hornier.

Here are a couple of highlights via a Twitter roundup.

One of my weeks was filled with all queer femmes! And I’m talking about only that sweet feminine energy. I’ve already talked extensively about how much I enjoy playing with ladies and everybody else in between, and 2019 has provided a bounty. Thanks, QTPOC community! I have been blessed.

My favorite part about playing with different genders and sexualities is that I get to explore different aspects of BDSM that I don’t usually play with. My two current obsessions are tit bondage and pussy clips, for example. It’s like having new toys, and you know your Daddy likes having new toys.

On top of that, I’ve recently realized that playing with trans folx has helped me hone down my verbal and humiliation skills. Rather than relying on usual gendered stereotypes, I become put into a situation where I have to humiliate the person for who they are at their core. It’s become a fun challenge for me.

I’ve been doing some spring cleaning in my panty drawer and have sold loads of pairs in the past couple of weeks. I’m absolutely delighted that the lot of you are the pantysniffing sickos I knew you to be. Way to live up to stereotypes! Of course nobody wants clean panties. Some of you guys even want them extra dirty…

My slave gimpy is sad that I have been selling all of those panties, but of course that just means he can buy me more.

My goal is to clear out all my old pairs of underwear by 2020, and I expect you pervs to snap up the rest of them. You bitches have two months. If you’d like to buy a pair of dirty drawers for yourself, shoot me a text on SextPanther or use my contact form to buy them from me directly. International shipping accepted and specific requests encouraged (I’m looking at you, extra dirty panty boys).

I’ve also been on Skype quite a few times this week. I typically don’t prioritize Skype sessions, but this past week might change my mind. In particular, this bedwetter was hilarious. He even saved up four? five? six? bottles of old piss just for my use. Needless to say, I used up all those bottles like the conniving bitch that I am.

If you guys keep on pouring old piss over yourself, you might just persuade me to stay on cam more often. Fight the good fight.

And let’s not forget about ballbusting! Because I did…a lot of it these past couple of weeks. This intelligent man decided that it was a good idea to use a rubber mallet in session. Needless to say, I was a bit fixated on using it the entire time.

I mean, if you have a dicklet that small, you’re pretty much only good for ballbusting anyway. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Finally, I had a shoot with Mistress Lucy Khan this week. I adore her. One of the biggest reasons why I love her is because we are two curly-haired Asians who love to shit on men. The commonalities are uncanny! But also, she’s just a Very Fun Lady. We had a blast shooting Asian supremacy and toilet humiliation videos, and to top it all off, we spitroasted her slave in a schoolgirl abduction fantasy.

I’m honestly very pleased with the plot for the strap-on video and am quite excited for it. Keep your eyes peeled next week or so!

And that’s it for now. Until next week, bitches!

(Photo by David Zayas Jr.)


A scat play primer, or why some people like to eat shit

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I shit on a lot of people. And I mean that in a very literal sort of sense. I take off my panties, I squat over the slave (usually their mouth), and I take a big fat dump on top of them, typically aiming for the mouth. Most slaves usually aim for full consumption, meaning that they try to swallow my doodoo. I do this quite frequently. On my busiest weeks, I have shat on a new person every single day of the week! Scat play is easily one of my most requested interests.

You could say it’s a bit of a specialty of mine. And happily so! I think it’s hilarious to shit on people, and I never in my wildest dreams could have imagined being paid handsomely for it. I genuinely believe I was meant to shit on men. I know that childhood vanilla An Li (before she became An Li) would be so proud of Daddy An Li today.

I’ve been meaning to write this article for a while, since I always get questions about this particular fetish once I make it known that I partake in this sort of play. So here ya go!

What is full toilet training?

Full toilet training (FTT or FT) is also known as hardsports (HS), scat play, or more formally, coprophilia (copro). It is the particular use of defecation within BDSM, be it on someone, around someone, etc. The poop itself often comes with euphemistic names such as caviar/kaviar, fudge, chocolate, or really whatever you’d like to call it. The “full” within “full toilet training” specifically denotes scat within the play, whereas “toilet training” can be a more ambiguous term intended for either piss and/or shit.

As a general whole, when somebody asks for toilet training, I assume they are asking for full toilet training. Most people who ask for just piss typically use the term “golden showers (GS)” or “watersports (WS)”. I feel the need to clarify this because I’ve recently had a couple of novices request toilet training under the assumption that it referred to only watersports, but this is not true. Had I not clarified with them, the results could have been potentially disastrous! Obviously, FTT is not for everyone. It’s important to specifically denote which type of activity you are asking for for that reason.

One reason it is typically referred to within a “training” context is because the activity itself is not easy. It oftentimes does require a bit more training or encouragement to swallow (if that is your particular goal), and especially so to consume a large load (which mine typically are). Most toilet slaves need multiple attempts before being able to swallow any significant portion. “Training” can also refer to the particular process of dehumanizing someone into something less than human, or a toilet. Of course, not everybody sees it like this – for some people, full toilet training can be an activity that lifts them up. For others, it is a degrading activity intended to humble and minimize themselves.

Do you shit in their mouths? How do you do that?

Typically, yes, I shit in their mouths. I largely do this because it is a preference of mine (less mess, more direct, also a lot funnier) and also because it is a common request in the realm of scat play. Not everybody asks for this. Some people want me to shit on their hands while kneeling behind me so that they can hold my shit in a reverent, kneeling manner, other people want me to shit on their cock so they can jerk off to it, other people want me to shit on a plate so that I make them eat it with a knife and fork, other people want me to mail my shit to them…the possibilities are really quite endless within scat play. Like all playtimes, it depends on the particular mood and goal of mine and the sub’s.

Forced full consumption is a common theme of hard sports, meaning they want to be made to eat all of it. This is my most popular request. Frequently, this involves some sort of bondage for an element of inescapability, consensual non-consent without a safeword, some (consensual) threats to provide a proper impetus, and a lot of patience. Admittedly, most of my subbies who ask for full consumption have trouble actually consuming all of it in part because I usually have surprisingly large loads.

I never allow direct intimate contact during FTT. Some toilet fetishists fantasize about being human toilet paper, meaning they want to wipe me clean (read: lick my dirty asshole). I don’t allow this (and also from a purely technical standpoint, a dirty shit tongue would not make for very effective toilet paper). Some shit boys also dream of me sitting directly on their faces to shit on them – also another activity I never do because of my personal preferences and hard limits. I typically use a toilet chair or squat on top of something to poop on slaves, and yes, they do see my asshole. While I don’t allow for nudity in most of my sessions, I figure that if you are going out of your way to undergo such an extreme activity as scat play, you deserve to see my asshole in the process. 😉

Isn’t scat play gross?

Yes, of course it is. It’s poop. What kind of question is that?

Luckily for my shitheads, I have a very high tolerance for gross activities. Full toilet training is not a common activity offered by many Mistresses is because it’s an inherently a hard-to-swallow activity (did you see the pun I made there?). Hardsports can be viscerally difficult to be around.

Conversely, many slaves fantasize about scat play, but when the shit hits the fan (lol), not everybody has the stomach for it (lol). It’s only natural for your body to want to reject human excrement. If this happens to you your first, second, or third time, don’t fret! This is a common response.

I typically find that the difficulty of the activity makes the appeal stronger in hindsight, even if someone vows never to try it again. Most boys I know do try it again. 😉

How do you schedule your poop? What do you eat?

Every Dominatrix who does hardsports has their own routine for this. I personally have my bowel movements scheduled to a fairly precise science. Because I require an earlier notification for all sessions (and particularly for scat play sessions), I have time to prepare my body. I have regular bowel movements during a specific time range once a day, and I work around that. I typically eat quite healthily at regular hours and drink quite a bit of water. Based on what I’ve eaten, the size of my meals, the time of my meals, my water consumption, the hours during which I go to sleep and wake up, the time of my last bowel movement, and the general feeling of my body that day (or week), I can predict when my next shit will happen.

I’ve always been a bit…anal retentive about my bowel movements. 😉

Sometimes I can’t shit on someone right on time. This is part of the nature of the game. Controlling the subconscious movements of your body is a futile game, so it’s important to know that the full toilet training may not actually occur before going into a session. I know some Dominatrices have on-call toilet slaves at their play spaces, however I do not own my own playspace and therefore it does not make financial sense to do this. Other Mistresses use shit from the day before. I don’t usually do this unless by request.

Why do people want to become a human toilet?

From my experience, human toilets can be broken down into a couple of categories. Consider it like a Venn diagram, where some people overlap and others don’t. Most people are usually some variable combination of these categories. Please keep in mind that all of my observations are anecdotal. I typically attract a certain type of Femdom audience, and what is common for me may not be common for other Mistresses. Additionally, the way I describe these categories are not hard and fast rules – they are simply my interpretations of them. Take this with a grain of salt.

The categories are as follows:

  • Humiliation.
  • Taboo.
  • Goddess worship.
  • Ass worship.
  • Intimacy.
  • Scat fetish.

If you’re an experienced toilet or toilet top and think that I am missing out on a key category, please feel free to let me know! I’d love to hear your feedback on this.


This is the most common theme for the people who come to see me. Toilet play can be, as you can probably surmise, an incredibly degrading and disgusting activity.

Think about it this way: a lot of kinksters like a bit of humiliation in their BDSM. You want to know that you’re being “naughty” and “dirty” and “filthy”. You need to be punished. Scat play is an extreme extension of that desire. Scatplay is arguably one of the deepest forms of humiliation – after all, you’re getting shat on. What could be more disgusting and repulsive on your end than becoming the receptacle of human waste? How could you get any lower than lying on the floor while a Mistress takes a dump on you?


Nearly anybody into BDSM can relate to the desire to delve into taboo. People are often into taboo activities purely because of the illicitness and stigma behind it. I see it as this way: the more we repress something, the more it shows up in more extreme ways. A dieter may deny themselves food, but may then obsess about eating for all of their waking and sleeping moments. An extremely religious person might be taught that many of their sexual desires are sinful, and then may become a nymphomaniac. Britney Spears may be told that she has to be sexy and beautiful all the time, but then may go ahead and shave off all her hair in a desperate cry against beauty norms. You get the idea. Society may tell you that something is unacceptable, and then you spend the rest of your life fantasizing about it. The moment somebody tells you no, you want it to be yes. It’s reverse psychology at its finest.

Taboo-seekers often want to push the limits of what is deemed acceptable to both themselves and others precisely because it’s looked down upon. The more extreme the activity, the better. And consuming poop can be quite an extreme activity, as you can probably imagine.

Humiliation and taboo often beget one another in this scenario. Maybe you want to be humiliated, so you partake in taboos so that you can be humiliated for it. Conversely, maybe you’re into taboos but also want to be humiliated to highlight how forbidden it is.

Goddess worship

For those that consider scat play as an uplifting activity, Goddess worship typically comes into play. If you are worshiping your Goddess, then a toilet slave who has this perspective may want to worship her in all her glory – including her shit. You may want to express your reverence for her by becoming a useful everyday item, like a toilet. Or perhaps you want to humble yourself before her (in the same way that religious devotees humble themselves by kneeling), and for you, that way of deference might be to consume the lowest of her low, her excrement. You’re adoring your Mistress when you are consuming her caviar.

Ass worship

Perhaps you’re an ass fetishist. You like touching butts, kissing butts, sniffing butts, licking and eating butts, and fucking butts. You like everything about the booty. You’ve never really quite considered scat play, but one day, you start eating ass and you realize that there’s…a little bit of shit on it. You go ahead and eat the ass, and it turns out to be quite a pleasant experience. For once, that little remnant doesn’t disgust you.

Conversely, you find yourself getting more and more turned on by it. You realize that every asshole has some amount of poop on it. You realize that part of the reason why an asshole smells the way it does is because shit passes over it. You realize that farts are really just poop air. You start connecting the dots.

One day you wake up, and you realize you want to take someone’s shit.

Ass worship can be a slippery slope. 😉


Many people crave intimacy with their Mistresses, and understandably so. You’re engaging in activities deigned alternative to the usual sexual experiences, so trust and understanding go a long way to creating a memorable time.

Being underneath a Goddess while she takes a load on you can be a remarkably sensual and bonding experience. You are watching her do an activity typically relegated behind closed doors. You’re up close and personal. You can see the asshole bulge out, listen to her sighs, groans, and grunts, and watch her wipe. It feels vulnerable underneath her, opening yourself up in this sort of manner. These are typically things most people do not get to experience within such an intimate and direct sort of way.

Scat fetish

By “scat fetish”, I mean a true obsession for shit itself. Not necessarily for the ass, for humiliation, or really anything else, but purely the shit as the object of desire unto itself. This is the most uncommon category in my experience.

If you’re reading this, hopefully you have an understanding of a fetish. Having a fetish doesn’t necessitate a particular reason or ideology. It just is. Some people like feet, some people like hair, some people like cars, some people like trees. Everybody is different, and fetishes can arise in literally any thinkable form.

A feces fetishist may be someone who gets turned on by excreta wherever and whenever it appears. I’ve met fetishists who get excited by dog waste on the street. I’ve met people who have saved their own shit for further use. For some, it doesn’t matter who left it – it just matters that it’s poo.

Ok, so I think I might understand hardsports now. But why do you do it?

I wish I had some more enlightened philosophical or poetic reason to give you here. I really do. But honestly? I do it because I find it hilarious. I find the whole process of shitting funny since my humor never really grew past a pubescent thirteen-year-old boy’s humor. I like potty jokes. I fart loudly and laugh at myself afterwards. All my friends know me as someone who obsessively describes the quality of my own shits…on a daily basis. I’m a doo-doo Daddy, it’s true.

The combination of my bathroom humor, my anal retentiveness, my emergency-room-level tolerance for filth, and my general self-amusement when I make people do silly things for me has resulted in the perfect coalescence of someone who likes to shit on men. It couldn’t be more fitting.

I remember I was ecstatic when I first became a Dominatrix and realized that I could get paid to shit on men. I had just heard of Scat Queen Delilah and knew I wanted to be exactly that. It took me over a year before I had my first full toilet training playtime, but when I came out of the room, I was so fucking proud of myself. I knew I immediately wanted to do it, and I wanted to do it often.

While I don’t consider myself a Scat Queen (that title only belongs to Delilah, and for good reason), I do consider myself a bit of a shit specialist – and I’m proud of it! It just goes to show that the world can be such a wacky and fascinating place.

Oh also! The hot photo is by David Zayas Jr.